It's Thirsty Thursday! - I'm on a Midnight train to Georgia

Not really - I'm not on a train to Georgia - I don't even like Georgia!  However - it's 2:30AM do you know where my YOUR sleep is?  I really wish I could find mine - it ran away again and doesn't come home unless I feed the monster Ambien.  The insurance company says I can only feed the monster 14 days per month (I notice they don't say that to patients on birth control pills) - so basically I get a good nights sleep every other night - but since I took a few in a row and gave a couple to Meg over at the Members Lounge during our trip to Blogbust Blogher, I only have about 3 left until the end of the month - so Ms Bee is in a bad, bad way..........

So how about it people - what do you do to get a good nights sleep?  Do you take sleep aids?  Do you drink warm milk?  DO YOU drink Jack Daniels until you pass out?  I'm fresh out of ideas.........all I know is some nights it's like spinning the wheel of fortune in the sleep department you never know if you're gonna win or lose a turn!

I am sick today - I have a bad case of Blogher

So Meg and I attended Blogher 2010' in NYC this past weekend.  I took home alot of junk (water bottles, toothpaste, coffee cups, playdoh, etc etc.) and Meg and I had some EXcellent meals - we met The Zadge - who was just a blast! And Moomskers is a lovely woman - I thoroughly enjoyed my visit with her!

I met Bruce Jenner who I wished still looked like this.....

I was however ready to come home yesterday because if I heard one more woman in a restaurant discuss her children, labor or whatever I was going to SCREAM! SHUT THE F UP!  "I AM MOMMY WOMAN" "The Wheels on the bus", "Mommy of 3", "Mommy of 12", "Mommy loves her children" - MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY - do you do anything else besides be a Mommy?  WHAT'E'VAH - that's Boston lingo for Whatever - I AM MOMMY'D OUT with you folks!  I only want to associated with Mommy Wants Vodka, Mommy wants booze, Mommy is a lush and Single and Lovin' it!  That's where the real world is!

PS - Mommywantsvodka.com is real and she is very funny!  I enjoyed her discussion panel very much!

I think next year I am going to start my own Conference - I think I'll call it:  The Suburban Woman - do you think I will get any hits?  I don't have a real ranch but I like to call my home the ranch - hey it actually is come to think of it!  I don't have any horses either - but I have a dog who looks like one!  Does that count?  I only have 2 kids that get dirty - Matt tries to ride Carson my dog sometimes - but he doesn't wear cowboy boots - he wears Nikes - and Reebok or Bauer skates - minus the spurs!  I can cook too - but am not that great at photography - in fact I forgot to bring my camera to Blogher - but that's ok you can go over to www.designsbymeg.com/blog and see all the pictures there! 

Thirsty Wednesday and other news

I know technically it's Wednesday but what the hell - Thirsty Thursday can be any day - because on any given day we're all thirsty for something!  And because I will be leaving later today to go to Thelma's house, because Thelma and Louise are going to Blogher tomorrow morning bright and early!

Watch out for gun wielding Meg Thelma - because I'm not sure she's ever actually handled a weapon!  But rest assured she knows how to handle shopping bags and has in the past used her shopping bags as weapons!  Me, Louise, has actually shot a gun before playing redneck olympics with my brothers inlaw - back in the old days out behind the barn - we'd take my father inlaws empty whiskey bottles and use them for target practice - I always beat them - they wern't as good as I was - and they hated me for it!  Especially the Man's Man because back in those days he was still trying to wow me with his manly skills!  My brother inlaw Nick too - because as you've learned from previous posts - he has some issues with woman who can do things better than he can!

Meg and I took "I can't walk" Nana to the Dr's yesterday and she is now sporting a green cast!  Another 4 weeks in a cast - foot is not ready for weight!  The Dr also told my Mom he had a patient who's wrist was a mess and her xrays were read negative as well - he said he isn't sure he can fix her wrist!  I am betting that her xray was read by the same DUMB Dr who read my Mom's - at the same other nearby crappy hospital!  Hmmmm......

Lastly - I am sure many of you (all 3 of my faithful followers) have read Meg's blog this week about our new found cousin - I am looking forward to meeting her and her family - this is an exciting, scary, emotional time for her I and I hope to ease some of her fears and get to know her!

Hope to see some of you at Blogher!

The View, The President, The resident DIMwit and other ramblings.

Today's Edition of Thirsty Thursday brings us to the morning show The View.  I'm sure even if you don't watch it you know Barbara Walters, Whoopie Goldberg, Joy (my favorite) Behar, Sherri Shepard and........the resident Dimwit - Elizabeth Hasselbeck, you might have heard that our President, Barack Obama was guest hosting today with the ladies!

Surprisingly, Elizabeth behaved herself - had a nice big smile for our Democratic President and seemed to actually enjoy his company!  Elizabeth - I have a newfound respect for you - you were respectful and not too conservative minded batty - for you anyway!  Thank you for not screwing up my morning with Mr.President!  I am EXTREMELY thankful that you left your usual irritating self at home!

In other ramblings, I got a nice cortisone shot in the foot yesterday from Dr.W for my upcoming trip to Blogher in NYC!  My foot is feeling pretty good today and I promised the Dr that I would wear my sneakers and inserts if I ventured out in the city for a walk!  (or to go watch Train on the plaza Friday Morning!)

Exciting news flash! Meg, my sister over at the Members Lounge will have an interesting post coming up in the next day or so.  I don't know what else to say about it - it is emotional, happy, exciting, sad in some respect and you won't believe what a small world it is!  You also won't want to miss it!  Stayed tuned over at www.designsbymeg.com/blog for the full story!

Can't wait to see and meet some of you next week in NYC! 

A Jersey Shore afternoon

Ok I admit it - I turned into Mrs Snagglepuss this weekend - I sat in the house all day yesterday, I cleaned a bit, cooked a bit and then I turned on the TV - my only problem is a wish I hadn't because I ended up watching a whole afternoon of The Jersey Shore - haven't seen it yet?  It's mind blowing, thought provoking TV!

Our girl Snooki - AKA Snooks will attest to this!

Yes it's true - I've turned into a TV junkie over night!  You see it's not so much that I like TV - it's the damn heat that got to me damn it - damn it to hell!  I HATE the heat!  So Ms. Bee decided since it was very humid outside hat she was going to protest the weather and stay inside all day in her nice cool house!  Somehow she got herself caught up watching these idiots who call themselves, Snooki, Mike "The situation", Pauly D, JWow and so on!  What a bunch of fricking morons!  The only one here that I could see who actually has half a brain in his head didn't have a nickname - he called himself Vinnie - imagne that, just plain old Vinnie - Yo Yo Vinnie - Yo Momma is calling you - she wants you to go to law school instead of trying to become an actor - and you know yo Momma is always right - so take my advice and Just do it!  If u smatah' enough to get 'cepted at law school then you smatah 'nough to go!

Here's Vinnie and the rest of the "cast" - or cast of characters!

My boy Vinnie is on the far left end - he's the one without tattoo's!  Hmmmm.....

One last thought..............Hey Snooks - put your boobs away will you please?  They are like weapons in flight!

The New Adventures of Old Ms.Bee - Part II

Part II of my series Vacationing with the Children of the Corn - kids,  brings us to Pensacola Florida or as I like to call it:

We arrived at Bossy Bears my brother inlaws house on July 3rd - to a warm pool, sunshine and lots of fun!  There were cocktails to be had, laughs and lots of swimming!

Here's Bossy Bear in his pool giving orders to me I am sure!

The 4th brought my sister inlaws parents, her son and his girl, a smoked pork, fireworks and more cocktails! 

On the 5th the skiies opened up and it rained and rained, we stayed in the house and watched a movie while Bossy Bear recovered from his hangover!

On the 6th we ventured out to Floyds Fish House in Pensacola for some down home cooking - we had Oysters, shrimp and just some good old fashioned gulf coast food - and of course some Margarita's!  A good time was had by all!

The rest of the week brought relaxation, swimming, a trip to Destin, more food and cocktails!   AND my walk on the beach to see what is REALLY going on down on the gulf coast:

As you all know oil has been gushing into the Gulf of Mexico since April 20th - last week a cap was put in place and thought to have stopped the spew of oil into the gulf - I heard the cap is leaking again.....

Here are some pictures of my walk on the beach:

This bird was nesting within a hundred feet of this:

That's right - those blobs are oil blobs - how sad is that?

On Saturday the 10th - the Man's Man had a little scare - he came out of the house and said "my heart is racing" - So Bossy Bear took him to the ER - it seems The Man's Man had too many beers and not enough water during the week - he got dehydrated and the SHIT poop scared out of him!  Rule #1 when drinking - EAT - Rule #2 - HYDRATE!  DUH!  Here is the Man's Man with my AWESOME sister inlaw Rebecca - she is the sweetest, kindest person you have ever met - she even lets me say that I am pissed off at Bossy Bear!  This was about 2 hours before the event!  Mind you The Man's Man has already had a heart attack - so we didn't mess around - off to the ER he went!

And now we come to the moral of the story and I think Matthew says it best:

 

The New Adventures of Old Miss Bee - Part 1

Miss Bee is back!  Miss Bee is SO glad to be home!  Miss Bee enjoyed her vacation but let's face it - a vacation is not really a vacation when traveling with kids!  It's more like a trip!  I must have said Matt and Patrick a hundrend times, "Stop it", "cut it out", "leave your hands to yourself" - etc etc - Finally I resorted to SHUT UP!  Really I did!  With a few expletives thrown in!   I really can't stand kids fighting - and these 2 cherubs go at it sometimes and it drives me INSANE!

A few tidbits from our trip to Florida..........

We spent a few nights at the lovely Caribe Royale in Orlando - if you are traveling in that area I highly recommend this hotel.  It was so much better than the Disney hotel we had booked prior to finding this! 

For $105 per night we got a suite with 2 queen beds and a living area, the hotel itself was very clean and had many food choices, we ate breakfast and dinner there one day - both were good.  The pool area was very nice, clean and had good drinks - a MUST for Miss Bee when traveling with children - (and without too if I must be honest)!

Here are the cherubs at Disney - truth be told I don't think my kids are Disney kinda kids - it was very hot that day - so hot we decided not to do another park the following day and instead went to Downtown Disney were Matthew LOVED the Lego store and got himself a tattoo of Captain Jack!

I think Pat liked eating at the Rainforest cafe - he is smiling big here!

Why do people go ga-ga for Disney?  I had a nice time with the kids and have been a few times prior - I don't know, maybe I'm getting old - but I just preferred hanging at the lovely pool and watching Matt swim!  For $75.00 a day I would much rather have my nails buffed and my back rubbed!  Just sayin'!

After a few days in Orlando we drove north - to The Redneck Riviera - for some family time with my brother inlaw and sister inlaw!  We bonded with the President who was visiting and he modeled my sister inlaws beach hat - which I just happen to like so much that I bought myself one as well!

They live near Pensacola Florida and I don't think I need to remind anyone about what's going on there!  More on that in Part 2 of the New Adventures of Old Miss Bee - with a subheading of "Look and see what BP has done to our beautiful beaches and other ramblings"