Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Thursday Thursday - The Help Wanted Edition

So............Ms.Bee occasionaly scours the help wanted ads on several job boards in case anything extremely interesting, flexible, terrific and earth shattering comes along that I might be interested in.  Today I came across a very interesting ad that I would like to share with you.

ARE YOU A LOGISTICS MAVEN WHO LOVES HELPING OTHERS? 
Would you like to support a growing business and play a key role in bringing transformation and healing to families?

Would you like to be part of a team that acknowledges your gifts and calls forth the very best of who you are?

If you answered, “Yes!” or you know someone who would answer “Yes!” please read on… I’m looking for an Office Manager/Personal Assistant to help me take my business to the next level!

YOU:
• Love Systems, Organization, Administrative Tasks, Projects and Manuals
• Think outside the box
• Are technologically savvy: (word, power point, photoshop, etc.)
• Find it easy to navigate your way through social media
• Take initiative and aren’t afraid to ask questions
• Enjoy helping others
• Are an excellent communicator
• Love solving problems
• Pay attention to details
• Believe in going the extra mile
• Are committed to personal growth

I’m looking for a team player who: Has fun while working, but takes the work seriously; Can keep track of several things at once without getting overwhelmed and yet is willing to ask for help if needed; Can take something I want to accomplish and help me figure out the steps to get there.

Some of your responsibilities will include:
• Scheduling appointments
• Client payment processing and follow-up
• Phone + email communications
• Document creation
• Minimal audio transcription
• Ezine distribution
• Inputting blog, podcasts
• Setting up webforms, autoresponders
• Updating Systems + Procedures Manual
• Running errands
• Home/office upkeep
• Assisting at live events

Office Hours M, W, F 9:45am – 1:30pm
$10/ hr

This position may be for you if you are still reading and if you follow this next request. It is step NUMBER ONE of the interview process. Please email me a PERSONAL LETTER only. You can send it as an attachment (in Word only) or in the body of the email. If you are interested in the position, in the subject line please write “Office Manager-Your First & Last Name”

Please DO NOT EMAIL YOUR RESUME at this point. Yes, you read correctly, do not send your resume at this point.

Please WRITE A SHORT PERSONAL LETTER that includes the answers to the following:

1. What are the benefits you would bring to this position? – i.e. The skills &/or qualities that are your strongest (3 or 4 would suffice.)

2. What wonderful things have people said about you (in a work or other environment) (This is no time to be bashful!)

3. Why you are attracted to this position. (Again, no time to be shy - be honest.)

4. Your cell phone #.

Your email/ letter should simply state (with the above suggested guidelines) why you would be an excellent addition to our winning team and why you’re excited about what you know of this opportunity. Please, no stock letters to “Dear HR Director” – they will be deleted and you won’t be considered. I am hiring immediately! You will hear from me (via phone and/or email) within a few days.

Remember:

***DO NOT SEND YOUR RESUME now otherwise you're email will be deleted***

*** “Office Manager - Your First & Last Name” must be in the subject line exactly as written (but with your actual name) if you want to be considered.
  • Location: xxxxxxx  (FANTASY LAND)
  • Compensation: $10/hr starting rate-with opportunity for growth
  • This is a part-time job.
BARF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

$10.00 per hour?  IS THIS PERSON "F"ING INSANE?????????????  How about you put the crack pipe down and get yourself sober you FREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 
 
These are the kind of people that never find the right person because they WANT too much and expect people to work for nothing!  Yeah I'll do all this and more for you - FREAK! 
 
I'm still laughing...............I laughed so hard I responded to THIS FREAK and told them they WERE A FREAK! HAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!  I felt so much better after I did that!

13 comments:

  1. The whole time I was reading I was thinking "$10 an hour????!!!!"

    My boss just hired someone who used to be an exotic dancer. I wonder if she realizes she'll make minimum wage and no one will be sticking dollar bills in her waistband!

    ReplyDelete
  2. And here I thought being a laundress and taking care of designer clothing was the ultimate job!

    ReplyDelete
  3. The babysitters in my neighborhood get $10 an hour, just for staying awake while the kids are asleep.

    ReplyDelete
  4. The FREAK did not respond! I didn't expect the FREAK would though!

    What's funny about this is that the town it's in is just a few short 15 miles outside of Boston in a very afflent town - it seems to be that its the usual case of the more you make the less you pay............The FREAK is CHEAP!

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